Welcome to a fashionably darker way to celebrate Valentine’s Day. If a red and black Valentine aesthetic appeals to you, you’ve come to the right place. While we aren’t here to eschew love or anything like that, we’re rather skipping over the light-hearted holiday flair and embracing something more adult.
If you are curious to learn what a ‘moody red and black Valentine party’ is, delightful! We will cover everything, but first let’s define what this party is not. While initially tempted to define it as a ‘noir’ Valentine’s party, it’s more of a stylistically noir aesthetic without any actual semblance to the movie genre. There’s no connection to noir film nor bloody grim. The risk of a ‘noir’ descriptor would potentially mislead readers to expect a dark, bloody Valentine party. It is not (sorry to disappoint if that’s what you were after!). We are instead focusing on a dark aesthetic which is moreso mysterious and potentially sinister in some vindicated way but overall delightfully dramatic.
A red and black Valentine aesthetic is all about elegance, power and sophistication. That can look as old school and baroque or as cutting edge and modern as you want. You show up as you and invite your guests to do the same. It can be fun to see how everybody’s unique ‘dark aesthetic’ manifests! Below is everything you need to know to set the scene and create the party. Let’s begin, dark heart.
How to Throw a Moody Red and Black Valentine Party
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1. Embrace a Moody Maximalist Look with Red and Black Valentine Décor
To set the scene, we need to focus on colour, lighting and texture. Colours should be dark and dramatic – rich reds, stark black, some whites for contrast, and any deep jewel tones to complement. The focus colours are, of course, red and black. An easy and customary way to decorate for a party is to hang red and black streamers everywhere. Tapestries are also useful for covering a larger area for a greater impact. This bold red and black baroque-patterned tapestry would instantly transform a room.
Lighting should be moody and dim, just bright enough to show off your sweet space. Prioritize lights with warm-toned bulbs over cool ones (or better yet, replace them with red bulbs). Create a glowing ambiance with light strands or red lampshades. A red rose light strand is a sophisticated and romantic option.
If you can safely burn candles, light any red, black or white taper candles in elegant candlesticks to cast a seductive glow. These black and white marble-swirl taper candles are perfect. And a chandelier (with either real or dimmable imitation candles) is also a very fitting feature for this theme.
Furnishings
A juxtaposition of soft textures and harsh cold metals is perfect for a red and black Valentine aesthetic. For textures, we need touchable velvets, lush faux fur, and anything irresistibly soft, such as a red sherpa fleece throw blanket. Many people want to touch things and engage with their atmosphere rather than just stand around as observer. Throw pillows invite guests to settle on a sofa or other sitting area, but if yours happen to be in clashing colours, you can revamp any standard square throw pillow with a fabulously chic cover.
At the same time as we focus on engaging textures, we also showcase striking objects with defined edges. Including contrasting sharp surfaces in your moody maximalist party décor beautifully symbolizes the complicated reality of a heart that’s both warm and red while also being cold and black. Mix the vibrant with the dark, the hot with the cold, the soft with the sharp.
If you have any ornate décor or furnishings with a serious and romantic edge, use them for this party. Old intricate ironwork, heavy jewel-toned drapes, dark lace, dramatic tablecloths and cloth napkins or placemats in similar dark colours. Whatever you can pull together to create dramatically adult romance will serve this purpose nicely. Don’t shy away from patterns so long as the colours are mostly subdued or dark.
Florals
Flowers provide a gorgeous visual appeal, but limit floral arrangements to red and dark coloured foliage. A bouquet of red roses is perfectly romantic, but you can wrap the vase in black lace or display it among a black vignette. Alternatively, display a bouquet of artificial red and black silk roses. Dried flowers are another great theme appropriate option.
Keep in mind that while you want your red and black Valentine party to look and feel luxurious, it needn’t actually be very expensive. You can often find inexpensive party supplies if you know where to look, and you can almost always DIY party decorations with some spare time and motivation. Thrift stores and vintage shops are on your side when searching for old, dated items.
2. Serve Red and Black Valentine Refreshments
It should go without saying that chocolate is the priority food at a moody red and black Valentine party. Include rich red snacks like cherries, strawberries and blackberries, and definitely combine the two food groups by offering chocolate covered/dipped fruit. For more savory fare, consider seasoned black rice (extra juicy choice since it’s dubbed ‘forbidden rice’) with kidney beans, red peppers and red onion. Blue tortilla chips (close enough to black!) can pair with red salsa. If you serve meat, rare red meat is naturally a fitting option.
You may of course need to take some liberty here and offer whatever delicious foods of any hues. Don’t be too married to the exact colours (no need to char anything to blacken it – neither healthy nor very tasty!). Red offers a more generous array, especially in produce – juicy cherry tomatoes, raspberries, and so on. To drink, offer fitting bevvies like (black) coffee or espresso, black tea, hibiscus ‘tea’ (actually a tisane), and red wine. Cherry soda offered alongside black cola makes a fun pair. And whatever types of food you include, it will all look fabulous presented on black and red paper serveware.
3. Set the Ambience with a Delightfully Moody Playlist
For a red and black Valentine party, you want to play music that’s moving, energizing, intriguing, and temping. Let people relax and let loose. Inspire everyone’s dark, romantic sensibilities. This isn’t the time for playful pop or hyper rap. It isn’t a setting for country heartache or relaxed reggae. Play music with a timeless pull. If you are reading this because you want a dark Valentine party, you probably already have an idea of what type of moody ballads to play. If you aren’t quite sure, check out the list of songs below for inspiration. You’ll know when you hear a sound that resonates.
Dark Valentine Inspired Songs:
- Feeling Good (Nina Simone)
- Whole Lotta Love (Tina Turner cover)
- Sway and Üsküdar’a Gider İken (Pink Martini)
- Fondu au noir (Cœur de pirate)
- I Love Paris (Georgia Gibbs)
- All of You (Instrumental) from Miss Fisher and the Crypt of Tears soundtrack
- Fingertips (Emiliana Torrini)
- Strangers on a Train (Lovage)
- Heart Stop or Shaman in Your Arms (Wax Tailor Ft. Jennifer Charles)
- Glory Box (Portishead)
- Rosy Path (Elysian Fields)
- Nature Boy (Moulin Rouge)
- Silverscreen (Jesca Hoop)
- Moment For Life (Miguel Berkemeier)
- Ghost (Strobobean)
- Malagueña (Ernesto Lecuona, performed by Anat Navarro)
- Misirlou (performed by Orchestra Mosaika)
- Come Rain or Come Shine (Alison Eastwood cover)
If you want atmospheric background music instead of a playlist of songs, the Cruella movie score offers a delightfully dark soundtrack for a red and black Valentine party. It blends old fashioned eeriness with powerful, modern edginess. You may also enjoy instrumental dark tango music for an elegant mood.
4. Include Evocative Scents
Don’t miss an opportunity to dazzle everyone’s senses with sensual aromas. If you have fresh roses, that alone provides a lovely fresh floral fragrance. If you are already burning candles, include some irresistibly scented ones such as these:
- Red wine candle (for a bit of cabernet, merlot, rose, red berries and vanilla)
- Black heart-shaped tealight candles are perfect for a tablescape or dispersed along any other tables or surfaces (smoked sandalwood scent)
- Double wick leather candle for a seductive masculine scent
- Le Labo Santal 33-inspired candle for a warm and luxurious scent
- Red rose-scented pillar candle or a rose-scented candle in ornate red glass jar
- Scented red or purple mini candle in similar ornate glass jar
- Gold glitter narrow pillar beeswax candles are unscented but offer the naturally light honey beeswax scent while providing a dazzling glittery glow
5. Prepare Red and Black Valentine Activities
What kind of things do you like to do at a party? Whatever it is, make that happen at your red and black Valentine party! Maybe you and your friends are happy with the usual chat, eat and drink routine. Or maybe you like to dance (clear a little space and have a ready playlist). Do you and your troupe enjoy games? If so, have some game ideas ready.
Does everyone love a good laugh? Challenge your guests to something unexpected like a belly-dancing contest. Have music ready and let each person give their best shot (or, if everyone’s a bit shy, let it be a group effort). Make sure you have a prize on hand (such as a cute plush black heart pillow, for instance) for those whose efforts are most earnest!
If any guests have the gift of the gab, have some thematic prompts ready for a juicy dark Valentine story sharing sesh. Some fun examples include:
- Worst date ever
- First forbidden crush
- Favourite shadow daddy
- Favourite femme fatale
- Juiciest date ever
- Most indulgent fantasy date
You get the picture. Do keep your guests’ personalities, cultures, and comfort levels in mind, though, so that you include activities that everyone will enjoy!
6. Have a Red and Black Valentine Exchange
Adult Valentine’s parties aren’t usually events where people exchange Valentines. Except for private swaps between lovers, communally exchanging Valentines is typically limited to kids’ classroom settings. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t pave the way and request that each guest bring one Valentine to share. For a moody theme, though, spice it up by making it a blind black Valentine exchange. In other words, no one knows who will receive their own and know one knows whose they’ll receive!
To make this less awkward and more fun, challenge guests to write a three-line poem that summarizes how they feel about their favourite person (whether that favourite person already exists or not) or their favourite animal/pet. This can be heartfelt, it can be funny, it can be (appropriately) dark, or all of the above! The entertaining thing will be seeing who gets which, and how relevant or off-the-wall the description is. While all decent people exercise curtesy (and hopefully also common sense), do remind everyone to be respectful and appropriate.
Always think about your guests and which types of activities they would most gravitate toward. Keep this in mind as you plan, and remember to choose your guests mindfully and prioritize friends who you know would most enjoy a red and black Valentine theme. If you aren’t sure, just reach out and ask when you send the initial invites! People will always surprise you and you never really know the depths of one’s interests until you ask.
7. Dress the Part
You can hardly have a red and black Valentine party without wearing a red and black outfit. Invite your guests to do the same! If you and your friends love dressing up, encourage them to wear their most indulgent attire. Whether you propose formal wear, vintage garb or wildly creative, give guests creative license to go big with these colours. While not everyone has a red article of clothing, almost everyone owns something black so this should be easy to pull off.
If you want to really go all out and pull a funky red and black Valentine costume together, check out these unconventional clothing items and accessories:
- Long red satin gloves are classically glamorous and complement anything from a casual black tank and slacks to a sleek black dress
- These Mary Jane platform shoes with rivet-studded ankle straps are rebelliously fun and can come in bright red or black
- For a playfully punk goth vibe, pair this red and black lacy tulle skirt with black lace-up waist pack with a black blouse
- For an extra dramatically fun flair, rule with this red and black corset dress with tulle skirt
Summary of Things to Get
So now you know what to do to throw a deliciously moody red and black Valentine party. To wrap things up, here is a general list of the tangible items to acquire for it:
- Romantically dark and moody maximalist décor
- Red and black food and beverages, as well as disposable party supplies (unless you prefer using dishes)
- Dark and dramatic music
- Seductively scented candles
- Anything for activities, such as game prizes and a Valentine
- Red and black outfit
Red and Black Valentine Party Preparation Checklist
Most of the steps below apply to any type of party you host. They include basic party planning guidelines to help you organize and plan when to do what (you can find more thorough details in the Best Party Practices posts). But note that while best practices involve planning weeks in advance, that doesn’t mean you can’t pull together something last-minute. Just be mindful of your expectations and allow some grace for imperfections. The point is to have fun, after all, so just do your best!
1. First, confirm that people can come on any chosen date
- Choose party date/time, and preferably alternative date(s) if possible
- Choose your guest list and decide the minimum number of guests you prefer (to make this worth your effort)
- Six weeks out, confirm guests’ interest in the party and their availability on your chosen party date(s). The only necessary details at this time include what type of party it will be (moody red and black Valentine themed); any requested participation (such as dressing in red and black or bringing a Valentine); the party date and general time of day; and your address (or relevant party location)
- This initial step simply gets people to confirm that they’re able and willing to attend and will save the date. If your preferred minimum number of guests confirm interest and availability, have them lock it in. You now have a red and black Valentine party to plan!
2. Next, proceed with the fun planning
Once you have your dark Valentine party date established, the first thing to do is get out your calendar and map out and schedule every step of preparation activity you’ll need to do. If you don’t schedule time blocks on your calendar soon enough, you’ll likely become overwhelmed and unprepared by the day of the party. Spare yourself the stress! Review the How to Be a Good Party Host post for tips on what you can do to be confident, prepared, and ahead of the game. Party planning requires some thought and effort, and decent people will notice and appreciate it. So that being said, below is a general overview of what you can expect to do leading up to the party:
- Grab a cuppa and sit down to schedule time on your calendar for each step of party prep as listed below
- Create invitations with all the details and send them out 4 weeks before the party
- Order any party supplies and decorations 3 weeks out (so they arrive in time to set up)
- Go shopping for any party supplies/decorations that you don’t order online, as well as non-perishable food/drinks that you’ll use
- DIY party decorations (if applicable) – including your Valentine to share
- Acquire perishable food/drinks early enough in advance to prepare in time for the party
- Set up decorations (except for things that shouldn’t go up until day-of)
- Prepare food/drinks that can be prepared in advance
3. Day of Party
The reason it’s so important to get as much party prep done in advance as possible is because you’ll likely want some time to yourself to relax before the party, especially if you have a busy week. So make sure you plan your day-of-party preparations early enough as well, to allow yourself that needed time and space. Within those day-of-party time slots, expect to finish these preparations:
- Complete any last-minute food/drink preparation that wouldn’t otherwise keep earlier
- Set up any last-minute supplies and decorations that aren’t up already
- Prepare your moody Valentine ambience with music and candles
- Dress up in your favourite red and/or black Valentine party outfit
- Once all’s in order, take plenty of time for preferred self-care activities that ground you and get you in a good head space so you can be a happy host!
Ready to Host a Fabulous Red and Black Valentine Party
If any part of you enjoys dark love themes, you are meant to host this party. You’ll likely be a pioneer among your friends since even a standard adult Valentine’s Day party is itself something of a unicorn. Encouraging people to even get out at all for a group event on Valentine’s Day, as opposed to a solo date with a partner, is a new idea for many. So when you propose a dark Valentine party, well, that’s going to bring out the fun dark side in more people than you’d expected! Go ahead and give it a go if this appeals to you. You’ll be in good company.
XOXO